


Countdown

by Adira_Tyree



Category: Original Work
Genre: Chronic Illness, Chronic Pain, Gen, Headaches & Migraines, Pain Management, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-02
Updated: 2014-10-02
Packaged: 2018-02-19 14:33:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2391854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adira_Tyree/pseuds/Adira_Tyree
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chronic. Hemiplegic. Migraine. Disorder.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Countdown

Shutoff in 3 minutes.

It sounds a lot like the sound of my own mind:

Every morning, when it’s me and my migraine cuddled in bed together,

When every day is a struggle,

When it took me three damn tries to bother making the decision

To write this poem down.

 

Shutoff in 2 minutes.

The clock counts downward and it doesn’t care if I look up,

Doesn’t care that I’m still here trying,

Doesn’t care that I’m writing the best damn essay of my college career,

Doesn’t care that my time is up, and I’m not even finished yet.

Pass your papers to the front.

 

Shutoff in 1 minute.

There’s a star on your desk and it keeps distracting me from the interview.

You notice that I’m staring where there is nothing you can see,

And you ask me why I took 8 years to get my bachelor’s degree,

Writing notes to yourself about how I’m distant, distracted, lazy,

About how I’m definitely not the right candidate for this job.

 

The screen turns black.

I can’t see anymore because the blinding pain has taken over me again,

I can’t hear you asking me what I want to eat over the sound of my nausea,

I can’t think about what you are expecting of me,

I can’t stand to open my eyes again, because all they see is failure.

And this is exactly what I’ve come to expect of life.

 

I turn the screen back on.

I let the colors flood me.

I let the sounds bombard me.

I let the words drift back in.

I let you tell me that I’m doing it all wrong and how I need to focus.

And I smile, because you don’t even know the meaning of that word like I do.

**Author's Note:**

> If you want to know more about chronic migraine, please, please, please consider asking me about it. Because I will happily tell you anything you want to know about it. If you don't want to talk to me about it then look it up online, because the only way that this invisible illness will be brought into the light is if people are willing to see it.


End file.
